Scrambled - Southern Diner (Greensboro)

Scrambled is a popular brunch place about a mile from the UNCG campus.



This is what their "Forester" scramble plate looks like when you asked for no brie and no eggs. I wished I'd had my wits about me and asked for them to replace the omitted ingredients for extra mushrooms or tofu, because removing the animal products takes away half the dish while you still have to pay full price. Then, when I had my first piece of tofu, I was kind of glad I didn't ask for a replacement portion, as the tofu was squishy and horribly bland. Luckily there was hot sauce on the table to make it bearable.

I will say the hash browns were good; crispy but not too greasy. The biscuit was also good, but I failed to ask if it was vegan (pretty sure it was a butter recipe).

Scrambled also has a vegan chili or a mushroom gravy and biscuits. Wish I'd gone with my instinct and gotten the gravy and biscuits.

All in all, it's one of those places where your carnivorous family members invite you to go because there are some veg options, but it's mostly a greasy-spoon joint that you feel iffy about for several reasons.

Ho hum. There's perhaps never going to be a robust enough market to sustain a totally vegan Americana diner. ...Then again, we're going to have to fight climate change with diet change if we intend not to die.

Veganized Triple D #1

There was an episode of Diners, Drive-ins, & Dives which featured the "Wisconsin Burger" from Gott's Roadside restaurant, located in St. Helena (Napa Valley), CA. The burger is served on thick slices of buttered and toasted bread topped with grilled mushroom, onion, and lots of cheddar. Having only seen the episode once, I do not recall if it had bacon, or if the onions were caramelized or simply grilled. Nonetheless, when I saw it, I latched on to the idea of veganizing it. 

So, this post is another one of my rough guides with suggestion links to making your own "Wisconsin Burger" so that all your omnivorous friends can stare at the unholy mess of veganized Americana you're eating. That'll teach them to the contrary about always saying your food doesn't "stay" with them or "stick to their ribs." I'll show you true Gluttony, damnit!!

Components

• A burger patty recipe, preferably involving bread crumbs and vital wheat gluten (I used Vegan on the Cheap's "Better Bean Burger" p. 178)
• BBQ sauce (your favorite recipe or bottle brand)
• Grilled or caramelized onions
• Grilled or sauteed mushrooms
• Either purchase nondairy cheddar (e.g. Daiya) or a mock cheddar sauce made at home
• Thick sliced bread, buttered heavily (this recipe is good for sandwich bread)
• Vegan bacon (optional, especially if a batch isn't already in the freezer)
• Consider between the "Believable Vegan Bacon" or  the "No Meat Athlete" versions

^Clearly, making this many things (possibly from scratch as I have done) means that this burger is time-consuming and perhaps best left as a special project for when you have ample time or can prepare components such as the BBQ sauce, bread loaf, or etc the day before. But, despite all this work, you'll love this sandwich once you pick it up and BBQ sauce oozes out over your fingers.

Dictations for assemblage

1. Start your BBQ sauce and caramelized onions well in advance 
2. While those are finishing up from the low and slow, compose the bean burger mixture of your choice. Once the patties and mushroom slices (and perhaps bacon) are frying in an oiled skillet, butter the thick bread slices; as soon as the patties are done and removed from the skillet, start pan frying the soon to be toast.
3. When the bread is in the pan, slip a spatula under the patty and start piling onions, nondairy cheddar, shrooms, and veggie bacon on top. (The heat from these items will start melting the Daiya if you put it in the middle of the pile.)
4. Once the bread has a light crusting on both sides, take it to your plate or cutting board, smear both slices with BBQ sauce, and then carefully slip the piled-high patty on top of the bottom slice.
5. Sink your teeth into sauce-oozing, savory heaven.

This burger may not be a pretty boy, but I love him anyways. 

Then again, in some ways I'm sort of sad that it looks so much like American food ostensibly devoid of colorful vegetables. So, feel free to add a slice of sweet tomato in there...

And, while you're delving into your indulgent side, make these brownies, whose secret to a dense, moist cake is blueberry preserves. (Although, I'd prefer to replace the half cup whole choco chips w/ walnuts or salted pepitas.)

Vegan Club Sandwich

Components

--Three slices of a bread of your choice, toasted

--Eight slices (about half of a 5.5 oz package) of (peppered) Tofurky slices [or slices of homemade seitan loaf]

--Two heaping(!) tablespoons of caramelized onion [five to six 1/4 inch slices when raw]

--Vegan mayo [If you even care for it. I’ve never liked mayo]

--Immoderate gobs of a mustard of your choice*

--1/4 t finely chopped fresh oregano [if you have it lying around or growing in your windowsill]

--Fresh cracked black pepper

--As much tomato and lettuce as you please

*Here the possibilities are endless for mustard enthusiasts such as myself. I used a brand native to my home state of N. Carolina, called “Bone Suckin’ Mustard,” which doesn’t sound vegan at all, but the creators just want you to put it on meat; there’s no animal bits in the ingredients list. Anywho, it’s a positively delicious mustard that is sweet and spicy because molasses and jalapenos are involved.

Also: Traditional club sandwiches come with bacon on them, but I am a culinary freak who has never liked bacon (yes, even before the thought of giving up meat ever crossed my mind), so I didn’t bother to find a replacement for it. If you think that this, along with the absence of mayo, is a deal breaker and reduces this sandwich to merely a triple decker, jazzed up “turkey” sandwich…well, I respond with an apathetic 'eh.' What do I care what you think? I’ll call it what I fucking well please.

Method 

1) Caramelize your onions. [If you don’t know how to do that, you are either a culinary newbie or an idiot for not learning how to make one of the best accompaniments in the entire food world. I have no sympathy for such ignorance.]  

2) Place bread slices on work surface and slather the first slice in sauce(s). Sprinkle with pepper and oregano. [Traditionally the crust is cut off to make the sandwich seem balanced on all sides or look fancy. I consider trimming bread crust an awful transgression. The crust is the best part you snot!]

3) Layer four slices of faux meat in folds (which give a better toothsome sensation upon biting), and then hold them in place (perhaps with the mustard knife leaning over them) while you spread out one teaspoon of caramelized onion.  

4) Sauce up your middle slice of bread on one side, setting it down momentarily to stack on the lettuce and tomato slices, and then use the bread slice (sauce side down) to stabilize the heap. Spread sauce on the remaining exposed side of the middle bread slice and repeat the layering process of Step 3.

5) After you’ve slathered, spiced, and put in place the last slice of bread, step back and behold the glory. Feel free to make this sandwich more mammoth if you have the appetite. Otherwise, I think this recipe as it stands is sufficient for gorging one’s self, especially when combined with a side of potato wedges.

"Hot & Spicy Potato Wedges" from Easy Garden Recipes (April 2012)

(Makes two large servings)

Components

4 T OVOO

2 T mustard

[The original recipe calls for 2 T Parmesan; I omitted it due to disinterest.]

1/4 t each of S & P

2 t chili flakes

1 sprig fresh rosemary, chopped [OR about 1/4 to 1/2 t dried rosemary, squeezed and crumbled in between your fingers]

Four medium (russet) potatoes (peels on, thoroughly scrubbed)

The original recipe also garnishes with four thinly sliced scallions and 2 T pimentos. [I omitted this due to laziness.]

Method

1) While the oven preheats to 400 F, whisk the oil, mustard, and spices.

2) Cut the potatoes into wedges and toss into the bowl of the dressing, attempting to coat evenly.

3) Spread the potatoes out onto two large baking sheets, making sure to give plenty of room between pieces so they don’t steam themselves.

4) Bake for 25 minutes, turning them half way through the cooking time.

5) Garnish and nom.

Garnish your final dish with a dill pickle spear, because it’s just not a proper American diner sandwich plate without one.